I recently saw a Facebook post asking, “Why do you go to church?” My immediate thought was to answer, “I don’t.” But I quickly realized that answer was too abrupt, especially for the religious mind that might quickly write me off as a heathen sinner on his way to hell. So, I thought it through and realized the better question for me is, “Why don’t you go to church?”
Anyone who has known me for over a few years knows that my life has been about attending church. I went to church when I was a few days old. We weren’t just Sunday morning Christians. We went Sunday morning, Sunday night, Wednesday night, choir practice on Monday, bowling league on Saturday, special services, revivals—you name it, we were there. If another church across town had a revival meeting, we were there too. That’s how I grew up—in church.
Unlike many of my age, I didn’t rebel against attending church. When I went to college, I walked downtown from campus to attend church on Sundays. I also participated in a campus group on Sunday evenings. My schoolwork and job kept me from attending most Wednesday night meetings, but I did attend some special revival services while in college (a state university).
I attended church when I finished school and became a public school teacher. I volunteered and helped with the music in the church. After a year, I moved to another school district and regularly attended church. After a few years, I became more active in the church and was elected treasurer. Shortly after, my wife and I started the first Spanish church in our city. We still attended the church services in the mornings, then jumped in an old bus and headed out to pick up the migrant workers all over the county and brought them to the Spanish church in the afternoon.
A few years later, we started working with a ministry in Nicaragua and traveled there regularly to help start a school in the landfill of Managua, along with three church congregations around Managua. We were church-minded. During that season, we began traveling to churches nationwide to present the ministry in Nicaragua. We shared and preached wherever God would open a door. After several years, we were invited to serve in a local congregation in Virginia, where I was pastor for over 17 years. Needless to say, we were church people.
So, it didn’t happen overnight when I said I don’t go to church. It was a process, and honestly, a process that the Holy Spirit led me into. After spending over 55 years in a servant capacity within the church system, we moved our family to South Carolina. While I decided to step away from “full-time ministry” (whatever that is), I never intended to step away from church.
You see, I was a lifelong churchgoer. I believed in church. I thought you couldn’t be saved and not go to church. I told people that. I recall one couple who became regular visitors at our church in Virginia. One day, they told me they wouldn’t be back. They said they would have coffee on their deck, read the Bible, and fellowship with the Lord. I thought they had lost their ever-loving minds. No way they were going to heaven. I was hardcore church. But God began to change some thinking.
While I was still leading the church, we experienced COVID and the shutdowns. Churches all over our state closed and stayed closed. We initially closed at the request of our governor and remained closed until we were granted permission to resume in-person meetings. We were the first church in our area to resume in-person gatherings. While some churches had a parking-lot church for many months, we didn’t do it. I somehow sensed God’s hand in the shutdown. I knew there was something more than just COVID.
Now, I’m not blaming God. I don’t believe He sent COVID, but I do think He was making things visible to those with eyes to see and ears to hear.
One of the most frequent phrases Jesus is recorded as saying is, “Those who have ears to hear, let him hear” (Matthew 11:15). Through that season, I began to realize how little the church impacted the culture in our city.
Would Anyone notice?
Over a year before COVID, I asked our congregation, “If our church closed its doors, who would notice? Who would be impacted?”
The answer was, honestly, no one. Those who walked through the threshold every Sunday would notice, but in short order, they could easily find another building to gather in. No, realistically, would anyone even notice if our doors closed? The answer I kept proclaiming was, “No! No one would even notice.”
Then, a year later, every church in the community closed. The vast majority had no services at all for a year. Others had a parking lot church for over a year to collect their offerings and keep the church-system rolling. We were the only ones who resumed in-person gatherings after eight weeks of closing.
I discovered that not only would no one notice if our church closed, but no one noticed that all the churches closed. Outside of those who attended, no one cared. And even when in-person gatherings resumed, only about 50 percent finally returned.
The church wasn’t making a difference in the community. No one even noticed we were closed. They saw if a store was closed, if the restaurants were closed, and when the beauty parlors were closed. But no one cared that the church was closed. Sadly, the church was insignificant.
When we moved to South Carolina, we went church shopping. Yep–let’s find what we like. We want good music. Comfortable seats. Good sermons that tickle our ears. I sat outside looking in for the first time in over 20 years. However, I was looking for more than a good sermon–I wanted the presence of the Holy Spirit. That was always my prayer when I was a pastor. I wanted revival. I wanted an awakening. I wanted more than just a good service. So we went from church to church to find which one Jesus attended.
I went to the big church, the mega church, the small church, the showy church, the hip church, the cool branded church, the couch church, the video clip church, and the national TV church—you name it—I visited. But one thing I noticed was that the Holy Spirit wasn’t there. There was a good show, good sermons (sometimes), and good music (sometimes), but it was all man-driven.
In my frustration of looking for a gathering place where Jesus went, I began to seek God. What I found was something I didn’t expect. I discovered that the church that man had built wasn’t the Ekklesia that Jesus had established.
Revival or Reformation
For years, as a pastor, I prayed and preached revival. I hungered for revival. I desired a move of God like never before. My mindset was Brownsville or Toronto. That was what I thought would make a difference. But it never came. Then I began to hear the word reformation in my spirit. Initially, I thought this was great because it was another level of revival. I started to hear national figures preach about a reformation that was coming. Revival was for the individual, but reformation was for the church.
I liked this until I realized a true reformation was more than putting a fresh coat of paint on the church’s walls. It required tearing down walls, building others, adding support beams, and much more. It was more than just exciting those who were sleeping. It was reforming the Ekklesia. I learned that religion had completely changed Jesus’s original intent when He said, “On this rock I will build my Ekklesia” (Matthew 16:18).
Religion completely changed the word Jesus used into another word called church. Man has further altered the Ekklesia from a family and a gathering of called-out ones set apart to do business on behalf of the King and His Kingdom into a congregation of passive onlookers.
All About The Pastor
1 Corinthians 14:26 changed my view. It says that everyone who gathers has a purpose, a song, a word, a teaching, a tongue, etc. E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E!! And it is all to be done to edify the body of Jesus. But in church, only one has teaching, a word, or a tongue (if that is even allowed). Only one is allowed to speak. Everything is focused on one central figure—the pastor and/or his/her designated personnel.
In study and prayer, I discovered that the word pastor is only used once in scripture (Ephesians 4:11). Every other time, shepherd is translated. Shepherds were the lowliest of the low in Jesus’ day. But man-made churches have elevated them, the PASTOR, to the top dog in the church system. They are the ones who are qualified to speak. They are the ones who are supposed to tell you what to think. Forget what the scripture says about everyone having something to say. In church, only the man-appointed pastor can speak. If you want permission, ask the pastor.
Over the past few years, I realized how far the church has strayed from the Ekklesia. Ekklesia is what Jesus said would prevail against the gates of hell (Matthew 16:18). The church, however, wasn’t even able to stand up to the COVID mandates. Nor did it want to. Instead of being a force for the gates to reckon with, the church has hunkered down within the sanctuary’s four walls to entertain itself.
In addition, I began to study and realize that Jesus is the head of the church, not the pastor (Colossians 1:18). Evangelists, shepherds, apostles, prophets, and teachers are gifts to the church. They are not supposed to be the kings of the body. Jesus is The King.
I also learned that sermons didn’t exist until about 250-300 AD. They were a Greek practice where public speakers were hired to discuss different topics. They were entertainment.
Later, this idea of public speaking was brought into the church when performers were hired to preach sermons. I also discovered that much of what we experience in a church service is a result of the merging of Christianity with the pagan religions of the day when Constantine made Christianity the state religion.
Didn’t Jesus preach sermons? What about the sermon on the mount? Well, that isn’t what scripture calls it. That is what a religious editor added as a section title. Like chapter and verses, section titles were added long after the scripture was compiled.
While I knew some of this before, I always thought it was just the Catholic church that carried these traditions and pagan rituals. But I learned that even the Protestant church holds many pagan rituals in our regular church meetings (i.e., auditoriums, stages, podiums, spectators, lay people, clergy, sermons, and more).
The more I dug, the deeper I saw that this system of church that I had given my life to was far from what Jesus intended His Body to look like. Instead of a family, united and functioning in authority and influencing the culture for His Kingdom, local pastors set up their own little kingdoms, where they could rule and reign.
It’s Time For Another Reformation
The church needs a reformation. That is a reforming, not just into something new, but to be reformed back into the designer’s original intent. That doesn’t mean we are supposed to return to first-century gatherings, house church meetings, or whatever. However, it does need to return to the foundation of having Jesus as the head and everyone serving, not just a pastor or paid staff. Jesus gave the gifts of prophet, apostle, shepherd, teacher, and evangelist to do one thing—equip the saints for the work of the ministry (Ephesians 4:12).
I began to realize that what I called ministry was what happened on Sunday mornings from 10:30 to 12 noon (or later if it was a good service). That was the ministry. I was in the ministry. It was my ministry. But that is not in agreement with Jesus. Any gathering would be an equipping session where everyone was equipped to minister in their community.
Ministry is not what happens on Sunday mornings within the four walls of a building. True ministry is what happens when everyone leaves the building and enters the community. Unfortunately, that is not the mindset of almost anyone.
When I was learning about this phase, I was still attending or trying to attend church regularly. Almost like clockwork, the Holy Spirit would ask me at the end of each gathering, “What were you equipped to do today?”
Week after week, I would have to answer. I was equipped to return next week, donate, join a small group, or volunteer to make coffee on Sundays, join the parking team, and be a greeter. But never was I sent out into the world to make a difference in the community for Christ.
Sermons were about me living better, having a better family, marriage, and commitment to Jesus. However, a single message never empowered anyone to be more than a bench warmer at a Sunday morning show. Even when Kingdom principles were mentioned, it was in the context of the individual living a better life, not sinning, or some other personal goal. Just try harder to live better, and Jesus will be pleased.
Week after week, it was the same at every church I visited: Come back next week. Bring a friend. Come to our building. Come worship with us. Join us. Attend the join-me class. Listen to our sermons. Sing our songs. We’re glad you’re here, even if we don’t know who you are. Just come back next week so we can fill up our seats and fill out our reports.
I realized that the church’s primary (maybe only) purpose was to exist so it could continue to exist. The goal is to get more money, have more programs, market itself better so people will choose this church over the other churches in town, so it can have more money, and so on. The church’s purpose is to perpetuate itself.
I attended one gathering when the pastor made a big push for annual giving. They spent the entire service talking about everything the money would go for: $50,000 to Nicaragua—awesome. I worked there. $25,000 to this project. $75,000 to that. That was $150,000 going to ministry outreaches abroad and locally. I was excited. Then came the kicker: “And we’re praying for $1.5 million for our new building fund.”
SCRAAAAAAAAAAAATCH! (the sound the old record players would make when scraping across an LP)
Ten times what was going to be spent for “ministry” to needy areas of the world was to pay for a new building so everyone could sit in a comfy building and drink coffee before the weekly sermonar. Something is wrong with this picture.
I’m Not Encouraging You To Stop Going To Church
Before I go any further, I am not interested in stopping anyone from attending a church gathering. I will still visit one from time to time. My purpose is not to tell anyone to stop going to a building and listening to a sermon on Sunday. But, at the same time, I believe something must change to fulfill Jesus’ plan for His Ekklesia. There must be reform.
So why don’t I go to church? I can’t, in good conscience, participate in a system that has strayed so far from the founder’s original intent—Yeshua, Jesus.
Jesus intends us to do so much more than sit in a building and listen to one person give their opinions about a verse in the Bible.
Is It Truth or Opinion?
Yes, I said an opinion.
Pastors will be indignant and state they are preaching the truth; however, I dare you to find one pastor who is not preaching a message where they’ve compiled information from something they heard someone say, or something they’ve read in a book, or something they learned in a seminary class, that was someone else’s opinion in the first place.
Remember, the Rabbis had their yoke, their teachings, and Jesus stirred the pot because His teaching didn’t line up with the religious mindset.
Today, pastors preach their opinions based on the views of many others. They are not preaching fresh revelation from the Holy Spirit, but preaching opinion.
I believe every pastor should offer a disclaimer on his or her message (did I say her?).. It is their opinion—it may be right, but it may be wrong. If you don’t believe me, you can walk down the street and listen to another pastor preach the same scripture from a different point of view and with a different truth.
Over the years, my understanding has changed. Things I once thought were correct, I no longer believe. My opinion was wrong, and it could still be off.
Even Paul, when writing to the local Ekklesia in Corinth, said, This is my opinion when he spoke on his own (1 Corinthians 7). Now there’s a hornet’s nest for ya.
The other thing is that people should give a reference if they read it in a book. I know pastors who will preach an entire book they’ve read as a sermon series.
When I was still employed in ministry, a pastor offered me his PowerPoint outline from his preached sermon series. His weekly titles were the chapter titles from the book. (Of course, he never told the congregation that he was doing a book report every week.).
I’m not anti-church and am certainly not against those who attend church. I believe there has to be more.
Some may ask, “Well, why don’t you go to a church and try to change it?” The answer is simple. It’s not my role to do that. It’s the Holy Spirit’s role and must be done from within, not outside.
I may visit your home and see things I would like to change, but it is not my place to tell you that you should move your couch to the other side of the living room or knock out that wall and build a sunroom.
If a church chooses to function in churchianity, it will continue to perpetuate itself.
I do miss the fellowship of other believers in the local church, though I do not want to create dissension in the ranks of any group. I do, however, hope to be able to gather those who have stepped away from the churchianity system already and bring us together to help establish a fellowship where there is no hierarchy of leadership, control, or power struggles.
According to research, some 40 million people have walked away from the organizational church system. Many have gone because of hurt, offense, or other negative emotions. I’m certain that a percentage of those 40 million people have walked away from faith in God altogether. However, a significant percentage have stepped away from churchianty, not God, because they see the flaw in the human-made church system.
Much like Martin Luther’s day, the church desperately needs reformation. A reformation beyond, with a return to Jesus’ principles, the honoring of the Lordship of the Holy Spirit, and the ending of worship of the Bible.
The most powerful moves of God on earth today are in places with limited access to the Bible but immense access to the Holy Spirit (China, the Middle East, etc.). In America, ten Bibles are on shelves in every Christian home, but very few people know the author himself intimately. They may be able to quote scripture and verse and argue with you about its interpretation, but they have no connection with the Rhema Word being uttered by the Holy Spirit.
Unfortunately, most of churchianity thinks the “Cat got His [Jesus] tongue.” But that is not the case. Jesus, the Father, nor the Holy Spirit has ever stopped talking, and He is certainly not limited to 66 books that man selected as the canon of scripture.
I’m not discounting the Bible. It is essential, but I think it is a total error to worship the book that the early church didn’t have and ignore the Spirit they did have. (I believe Bill Johnson said that.)
It is not my role to go to any church and create a disturbance, so I don’t go. I have pastors I consider friends, but I don’t go to their church because I can’t applaud the system they represent. I can’t stand idly by and support something I think desperately needs reforming.
While many people, at least in my family, think I have lost my way, I disagree. I have grown so much in the last few years. Maybe this is my wilderness season. Jesus sent Paul into the wilderness for 14 years. Jesus was in the wilderness, alone for 40 days. Perhaps I’m alone for this season while He speaks with me. I don’t know.
I do know I have grown spiritually. I have learned that doctrine is not everything. It’s not about knowing what I believe is right. It’s about actually believing what is right.
I have learned that knowing Him intimately is more desired than knowing about a book. I have learned about His grace and goodness at a level I didn’t know existed when I was in full press in churchianity.
I have learned that churchianty needs rules and regulations, membership rolls, and hierarchy to stay in control. Jesus established none of that, and I totally agree with the plan of Jesus.
Where will I be six months from now? I do not know. Will I be back in churchianty? God forbid, but if that is His plan, I will. But I do hope that God shows me how to connect with other believers who have, or are going through the same journey, so we can come together to reform His Ekklesia in the earth, at least in part.
